Damage Management

I am in active warfare but unaware of the munitions of the enemy. God is trying to remove all foreign objects from my laser lens, all resistors from my circuit board, all shrapnel from my body to prepare me for the day of fuller exposure to His presence and power. Any impurity allowed to be left in me at that day will become suddenly obvious and also fatal.

But I keep exposing myself to shells that explode at my altitude and fill me with more flak and shrapnel. I step out of God's protective restrictions and catch more shrapnel from hidden mines. These munitions are almost always camouflaged in appealing ways that draw me to come close to them before they explode. Watching videos has become the most effective munition known today. They come in different altitude calibrations to target people at different levels of weakness. Sometimes I am drawn in by the deceptive benign wrapper of advertisement or recommendations from others. Other times I am drawn in by my craving to spend time close to friends more than the quality of the entertainment.

This is usually the method used to lure me into the stronger explosions that create much more damage in my soul. I am filled with mixed feelings of regret and contamination from the shrapnel of lies and lust received from the movies along with confused feelings of supposed satisfaction for pleasing my close friends by spending time with them. Whatever the depth of damage, it sets me back spiritually and requires more remedial time for new repairs and emergency surgery that should have been spent in additional building on what God was trying to construct in me.

The walls need to be built and finished before the full-scale battle is engaged. My fraternizing with the enemy keeps blowing holes and breaches in the walls that use up valuable time for repairs and rebuilding of areas already repaired.