Inhibited Witness

My Utmost exposes a deep fault in my thinking. Many times, I now realize, I have thought that I must wait until AI better understand how spirituality works before I can say anything to my family members. They usually resent nearly everything I say about personal spiritual issues and I assume that I don't yet have the insight, maturity and a sweet enough spirit to effectively say anything. So I keep most of my thoughts and concerns to myself so as not to offend them.

However, this clearly looks like a catch 22 situation. I feel it is wrong to not warn them as I see them indulging in sinful desires and slipping deeper into habits of thinking and living that will ruin their soul and body over time. At the same time I am inhibited by their repeated reminders of my faults and my own strong awareness of my unloving and legalistic overtones that come from my years of conditioning. I know how reactive I felt most of my life when my Dad and others around me tried to address and correct issues and attitudes in me that they were concerned about. That single trigger is the easily is the easily accessed defense my children use to shut me off and keep me from saying anything that causes them discomfort.

Of course, looking at this situation this bluntly exposes the opposite danger but does not offer an obvious solution that is truly effective. Just blurting out warnings that tend to only create feelings of condemnation is not a Christ-like way attracting my family to Jesus. The insight in today's Utmost gives me a very good principle to apply to this problem.

I have been waiting for a clearer knowledge of salvation instead of having confidence in the power of the gospel. “If in preaching the Gospel you substitute your clear knowledge of the way of salvation for confidence in the power of the Gospel, you hinder people getting to Reality. You have to see that while you proclaim your knowledge of the way of salvation, you yourself are rooted and grounded in faith in God. Never rely on the clearness of your exposition, but as you give your exposition see that you are relying on the Holy Spirit. Rely on the certainty of God's redemptive power, and He will create His own life in souls.” (Dec 3) I need to shift my faith away from my ability to explain and away from my own experience that is still very much in process and imperfect, and focus much more on the power and Reality of Redemption.

I really don't know what that would look or sound like, but it certainly has the ring of truth. I await further revelation and empowerment from God to cause me to walk in His ways in this area of my life and relationships.