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But thanks be to God, who in Christ always leads us in triumphal procession, and through us spreads in every place the fragrance that comes from knowing him. For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing; to the one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance from life to life. Who is sufficient for these things? (2 Corinthians 2:14-16 NRSV)
I smelled the aroma of death and of life yesterday and this morning. It is that strange mingling of the two that challenges my heart to avoid the one and embrace the other. In the morning I attended a large church and was fading fast in my spirit through all the less than inspiring preliminaries so I made my way up to the video control room to touch base with people I used to work with and offer my services again. While up there I listened to the sermon and became deeply moved with both the message and the unusual passion with which it was delivered. It really connected with my heart and was needed and accepted.
In the afternoon I spent the rest of the day with one of my daughters and her friends. I found myself involved in discussions that were examining carefully some of their and my frustrations with how church or its alternatives are being carried out. We touched on a number of related subjects throughout the afternoon and I was trying at the same time to remain in awareness of the condition of my heart and spirit. At times in the intensity of my feelings during a discussion I find myself beginning to slip into a little bit of aggressiveness that begins to spoil the sweetness of the spirit that I want to maintain inwardly. I realize then that the mingling of aromas will send confusing messages to the hearts of others and I want to more carefully guard against being that kind of messenger.
I was blessed with the beginnings of heart connections with new people who I sensed shared some of the same desires and beliefs that I have. I tried to listen more openly to what different ones were sharing and try to pay attention to what their heart was trying to express behind their words. It is part of my effort to live more in awareness of the spirit realm and be more in touch with heaven's reality.
I ended the day with another heart-warming talk with a person very important in my life listening to their heart pains, their desires and their questions. I feel honored to be used at times as a channel of love, caring and blessing at these times and realize that in the process I receive strength, comfort and blessing myself. My heart feels more alive and synchronized at these times and I want to live that way more often and more consistently.
As I was waking up this morning I began talking with God about my feelings and listening to what He might have to share with my heart. It seemed more close and affectionate than usual and I lay there for awhile just enjoying the moments together. Later I opened my devotional book and the first text I read for today reminded me of something I had jotted down a few days ago and never finished putting together.
“Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma.” (Ephesians 5:1-2 )
“Love was the element in which Christ moved and walked and worked. He came to embrace the world in the arms of His love. . . .” {SD 147}
Suddenly a number of things began to coalesce and I felt a picture of having the privilege of snuggling up on God's lap and kissing Him on the cheek while being hugged in His arms. My heart remembers that God is neither exclusively male or female but the ultimate expression of both depending on our needs. So to say “him” is strictly for the purpose of getting through the narrow limitations of language and cannot be used to define our relationship, particularly in this context.
It felt so comforting to be able to realize that God not only allows me to offer Him/Her my affections but deeply longs for me to become “addicted” to this relationship. This also felt relieving in that I do not feel guilty about these emotions like I would have a few years ago. My picture of God has been radically improving over my recent past allowing me to come closer to Him in intimacy in ways that would have frightened me not long ago. As I have chosen to believe and fill my mind with more truth about what He is really like I am less afraid to come closer in affectionate ways to Him and receive more of His affection for me.
Sometimes I feel reluctant to quote a number of texts to support what I am experiencing because of the bad taste I have experienced from so much proof-texting in my life and my church in the past. On the other hand I realize that linking my experience and my beliefs to the words that God has spoken will breath power into my experience that is inherent in His word as it springs to life in my heart. So when I use texts in these communications I am not trying to prove that what I am sharing is “right”, but I am simply relaying how these verses were a part of the process of God communicating His feelings, His thoughts and the truth about Himself to me.
As I pondered the exciting ideas in the first passage from Song of Solomon two main things caught my attention and drew it to a number of other places that God wanted me to think about. The first was the beauty of the smell, the intense attractiveness and lure of the perfume that is the essence of the presence of God. This perfume is a part of the identity of God and emerges in a number of interesting places and ways throughout the Bible. This perfume also appears to have opposite interpretations in the noses of those who smell it depending on what they believe about God, “to the one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance from life to life.” This ties directly into the parallel phrases about the righteousness of God revealed and the wrath of God revealed that I have been seeing in various places also.
This fragrance of God is linked very closely with the symbol of oil which was also used a great deal in the very instructive system of the sanctuary services. Oil is also a symbol of joy which is the source of our strength. That makes joy and perfume nearly synonymous which would make a lot of sense given what perfume is generally used for, especially in the context of the first verse quoted. Perfume “poured out” is here defined as an exhibition of God's “name”. That took my mind to a number of other verses that shed a lot of additional insight on this thought.
I remember at least two other places that talks about God and “pouring out”. The first was one of my favorite passages to camp out in over in Ezekiel 36. “Therefore I poured out my wrath on them for the blood which they had poured out on the land, and because they had defiled it with their idols; and I scattered them among the nations, and they were dispersed through the countries: according to their way and according to their doings I judged them. When they came to the nations, where they went, they profaned my holy name; in that men said of them, These are the people of Yahweh, and are gone forth out of his land. But I had regard for my holy name, which the house of Israel had profaned among the nations, where they went. Therefore tell the house of Israel, Thus says the Lord Yahweh: I don't do this for your sake, house of Israel, but for my holy name, which you have profaned among the nations, where you went. I will sanctify my great name, which has been profaned among the nations, which you have profaned in the midst of them; and the nations shall know that I am Yahweh, says the Lord Yahweh, when I shall be sanctified in you before their eyes.” (Ezekiel 36:18-23 WEB)
The other place that talks about “poured out” is in the words of Jesus at the last supper with His disciples as He shared the juice of the Passover service with them. He may very well have been thinking of the verse from Song of Solomon in His heart when He said, "This cup that is poured out for you is the new covenant in my blood.” (Luke 22:20) A covenant is the most intimate of relationships possible and is what marriage and the intimacy of sex is all about. Jesus was really opening His perfume bottle, His own body, containing the fragrance of God's name, His true identity, and offering it to us as an alluring attraction into the deepest intimacy of love with God that can ever be experienced. He did this by the breaking of His body (the perfume bottle) and the spilling out of His blood in His death for us (the full release of the fragrance of God's passionate love) so that we would drawn to desire God with the passion expressed in Song of Solomon 1:2-3.
As I soaked in these wonderful emotions from God I put on my headphones and listened to a song from the group Selah that has been so enriching for my heart many times. The music and the words lift me higher and closer into the presence of this sweet perfume.
"You Raise Me Up" When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary; When troubles come and my heart burdened be; Then, I am still and wait here in the silence, Until you come and sit awhile with me. You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains; You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas; I am strong, when I am on your shoulders; You raise me up... To more than I can be. There is no life, no life without its hunger; Each restless heart beats so imperfectly; But then you come, and I am filled with wonder; Sometimes I think, I glimpse eternity. You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains; You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas; I am strong, when I am on your shoulders; You raise me up... To more than I can be. You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains; You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas; I am strong, when I am on your shoulders; You raise me up... To more than I can be. You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains; You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas; I am strong, when I am on your shoulders; You raise me up... To more than I can be. You raise me up... To more than I can be.
Lyrics by Josh Groban
