Random Blog Clay Feet: April 19, 2007
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Thursday, April 19, 2007

What Must I Do to be Salvaged?

“'Sirs, what must I do to be saved?' They said, 'Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household.' And they spoke the word of the Lord to him together with all who were in his house.” Acts 16:30-32. I found myself asking God this very question this morning. Then I was reminded to think of what the words mean and how that might sound using their more accurate meaning. Since “saved” and “salvation” are the same, and the root meaning is “restoration, returning to an original design and function”, then I see that “doing” something and getting restored to my original design and function are the main elements of this question. Generally speaking, when we ask what we should “do”, the question is coming from the context of our left-brain, external-oriented religious thinking, even if we are not known as being necessarily religious to other people. Religious people do not have a corner on living fake lives. It is our natural response to an exposure of the emptiness of our heart that has been nagging us all our life but we could not satisfy it or even understand it correctly until we see someone else living from their heart in joyful fulfillment. Then our own heart screams out in agony of desperation and we become more aware of how empty we really are and how deep our heart hunger really is. Consider the people who approached Jesus with basically the same question. “Teacher, what good thing shall I do that I may obtain eternal life?” Matt. 19:16. “Good Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?” Mark 10:17, Luke 10:25 and 18:18. As I was waking up this morning I couldn't miss the intense hunger of my heart awakened last night when I watched “Tuesdays with Morrie” at a friend's house with friends and family. It has stirred up awareness of how selfish I am, of how much the faults in others that irritate me are only reflections of how I must irritate them. The self-deception of my own hypocrisy is so effective that I find it impossible to see much of the truth about myself and of course cannot receive it from others attempting to tell me about it. But the heart is communicated to by example and demonstration, not with words and logic. Thus my heart was able to at least slightly communicate back to my brain how empty it is as I watched the actions, spirit and transparent unselfishness of Morrie in the way he related to the self-absorbed young man swallowed up by the typical distractions and busyness of hectic living, too distracted to be able to receive or give love with anyone. I saw myself portrayed painfully accurately in the example of the young man far more than in the character of Morrie. And my heart cries out, “What must I do to be saved?” I realize even more now how helpless I am to change myself. My only hope is outside, supernatural intervention by a Power that can transform me from a selfish, pride-filled, self-deceived nice guy (many would even dispute the nice guy part) to a genuine, caring, loving and expressive man with a servant heart spontaneously reaching out to touch the hearts of everyone around me. In the answer of Paul and Silas to the jailer who found himself asking this same question after having his own callous heart awakened by their startling behavior under persecution and abuse; their answer alerts me to the underlying basis for hope. It is not an intellectual answer, though it has often been degraded to that in religious teaching. It is a heart answer – belief in Jesus, the Creator and original Designer who created our hearts and is the only One who knows how to really satisfy them and restore them to their original design and function. Believing in Jesus involves trusting His motives and integrity and passion as well as His ability to change me. This kind of trust does not insist on knowing ahead of time how He will do it or having every question about His past dealings with me answered before I let Him have His way with me. Believing means that I let go of my resistance to Him and allow Him access to my emotions, my pain, my fears and my shame. Believing in God is not the same as believing facts and doctrines about God. That is a left-brain function and often blocks us from allowing our hearts access to true faith. Real faith/belief is a heart response as well as a choice to allow our heart to come out in the open and take the ultimate risk of self-abandonment. In so doing we are promised that we will find true life, true heart-satisfaction, real fulfillment and joy. But now my left brain analytical thinking is hijacking what my heart was trying to express and my heart is complaining that it is being ignored again. That is what a lot of people around me have been feeling as well. My mind wants to find a nice, tidy answer to wind up this post so it will conform to literary expectations and social norms. But my heart wants to scream, “What must I do to be saved, to be alive, to thrive and connect and bond with other hearts around me like I was designed for?”