Confessions of a See'r

Something that keeps me uneasy at times and that I have written about previously could maybe be called the seer syndrome. It is good that I feel this uneasiness and I welcome it's reappearance as a reminder to once again do a reality check. It might be called an anti-hypocrisy injection or any other number of analogies. It is the feeling I get sometimes when I am thinking about something or convicted about something I have read or has been presented to my mind and I almost immediately began shaping it into words and arranging and outlining what I am experiencing into another piece of writing. At these times I sometimes almost feel guilty, like I am using expression for writing as a premature excuse to bypass actually fully receiving into a deeper heart level the very lesson that I am presently given opportunity to experience. I use the word “experience” quite deliberately here because I try to make a habit at such moments to remind myself quite strongly that it is far more important for me to internalize the “lessons” and principles, or whatever term might better describe them, than to merely “learn” them and capture them with my intellect no matter how exciting or threatening they may be. I am coming to the place where, when I am reading something really convicting I suddenly discover my mind strongly applying what I am reading to one of my children or one of my friends that “really needs to hear this”. I am starting to come to the awareness that most likely that intense desire to apply this to someone else is most likely betraying the presence of a false god inside of me desperately trying to divert attention to someone else because it is about to be exposed. At such times I find it helpful to first of all not fall into the blindness of guilt feelings which usually only produce a smoke-screen of denial or avoidance because of fear. Secondly I deliberately choose to force my imagination to let go of my strong penchant to apply this to a person who so obviously needs to hear this and change. No matter how badly that other person may need this counsel and advice, I am not the conscience for that person so no amount of pressure on my part will help them accept what they need to hear no matter how I try to package it. A good reality check at this point is a call to memory of how I feel when others try to do the same thing to me and how resistant I instantly feel to their attempts to convict me on some point they feel I need to change. It is once again a strong reminder that only the Holy Spirit of our Designer is capable of convicting us while still keeping us in a safe atmosphere where we are willing to accept the conviction and repent. Only the One without sin is safe to cast the first stone, and God is not into casting stones to start with. After I have insisted on ordering my mind to let go of my strong desire to divert attention to someone else, I then remind myself of the principle of recognition that I have been well aware of for a number of years. Most of us are aware of this principle in theory but it is still a bit painful to accept it for ourselves. It is the principle expressed by some as “you spot it – you got it”. I have seen this proven true so many times in my life that I now accept its truth as real, but it still requires a firm decision to force my mind to live by it and redirect my attention to my own life and allow the instruction to do its needed work in my own heart without being diluted or diverted. The overriding truth that I must always keep uppermost in my mind is that my own transformation of heart will have far greater influence in drawing other into conviction on this point than any amount of head presentations no matter how eloquent or camouflaged. We are wired to respond to heart messages far more effectively than “religious” instructions that usually end up primarily producing resistance. That is probably why Jesus told the Pharisees that their method of religion tended to produce candidates twice as ready for hell as themselves because disciples of typical religion are filled with a spirit of resistance. Resistance, when faced with opposing “force” (the passionate love of God) can only produce heat and pain which, as I have written about extensively elsewhere, is the very essence of what hell is all about. (Am I starting to sound like a broken record?) What I am trying to express here without getting derailed too far is the feelings I sometimes experience when I feel a tension between receiving and giving. In reality my “witness”, is only as effective as the level to which my own heart has accepted and is being transformed by the things I am attempting to express to others through whatever means. Sometimes I feel so strongly about this that I restrict myself to simply jotting down a few notes about something that is strongly stirring me but is yet incomplete in personal application. I feel I need to at least capture it in brief notes so I won't forget it (which I very easily do to my great consternation at times), but it is not ready enough at my own heart level to share it with others due to a great lack of credibility. At other times I feel compelled to go ahead and express what I am “learning” even though I realize that I still need the impact of it to change my own life even more than most who may hear or read what I am sharing. In fact, I am aware that the people who may “need to hear it most” most likely will not be reading my posts, so I simply leave them out as gifts(?) to be received by whoever happens to chance on them or those that the Lord may lead to them for whatever purpose. Part of this issue also involves the tension created when people say “I was impressed”, or “the Lord showed me...”. I realize that I use similar expressions myself and I continue to wonder how to relate to such phrases and notions even myself. On the one hand it seems rather arrogant to claim that ideas and concepts and insights that I share with others come directly or indirectly from God. It always has the potential to be interpreted as laying undue claim to the ultimate authority to back up what I am presenting. There is no shortage of evidence for people doing exactly that along with the tragic results of such abuses. Just a cursory examination of the religious tyranny of the Dark Ages reveals the consequences of religious imposition of beliefs on others against their will. Those terrible acts of demonic demonstrations in the name of God will always eventually follow when men try to take the authority of God without accepting His true character. No one is immune from becoming this kind of false witness for God and so I keep in mind that I must be careful how I claim to be inspired by God in the things I say. On the other hand, I also sense that I need to be honest about how some of the “insights” I share have come to me. It seems that if I simply state them as my own ideas that I, in fact, may be claiming that of my own wisdom and superior intellect I have conjured up these things, and in so doing I will diminish the element of the influence of God's Spirit in my life and heart. I am well aware of the smallness of my own ability to think and figure out life on my own. I am also too painfully aware of how shriveled and hardened my own heart has been most of my life and its inability to receive and share joy. I believe that all true wisdom must flow through the heart. The “head”, or left brain where the tools of language reside, is the lesser side of our being that must struggle to express the much deeper and broader emotions, concepts and ideas that defy the simplicity of human language. One of the greatest problems against which all true believers struggle is the fact that almost universally religion has been condensed and restricted to primarily a left-brain set of beliefs, doctrines and rules. Even when it appears that our emotions are deeply involved in fantastic exhibitions of religious fervor, upon close examination it will often be found that this religion still has not taken root in true transformation of the heart but has only become an emotional stimulant and an imitation of the real heart-experience that God has in mind for us. The passage that was stirring around in my mind this morning as I felt prompted to express these things was from James. Therefore, putting aside all filthiness and all that remains of wickedness, in humility receive the word implanted, which is able to save your souls. But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his natural face in a mirror; for once he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of person he was. But one who looks intently at the perfect law, the law of liberty, and abides by it, not having become a forgetful hearer but an effectual doer, this man will be blessed in what he does. If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this man's religion is worthless. (James 1:21-26) One significant thing I noted while reading this verse some time ago was the apparent fact that the “mirror” and the perfect law of liberty may not necessarily be the same thing, even though that is always how I have heard it preached and taught. I am not trying to be dogmatic or argumentative here, but to me I found this quite revealing. When a person looks in a mirror, according to the text that person sees their “natural face”. I think that most would agree that the “natural” face referred to here is the imperfections of character that we all possess. And while it is indeed very important that we become aware of the truth about ourselves from time to time, it does not necessarily translate that the mirror from which we discover this truth is always the “law”. In fact, given the analogy the way it is written, I am drawn to conclude that the evidence points in a different direction. When it talks about the man looking in the mirror it seems to almost be a casual observation. It is true that he may be intentionally looking in the mirror and may be surprised by the reflection that he finds there in the revelation about his true picture. But that does not carry with it at all the intensity of the expression in the next example of looking intently at the perfect law of liberty. While the law may indeed be helpful in unmasking our faults and failures, I don't believe the law acts so much like a mirror as it does by contrasting. A mirror is a completely passive instrument that can only reflect light and create an image of what is in front of it. That to me is a long way from what I believe is expressed and implied in viewing the law of liberty. The law is a simplified expression of the very character and nature of God Himself – hardly a passive reflector of whatever is before Him. If we take a view of the law of liberty being a reflector of our likeness we have indeed arrived at creating a god in our own image. Maybe that's one reason we are so angry and afraid of God, because we think we see in Him all of our worst attributes and think that He is worse than us. Many of the doctrines and emotions in circulation today about God reveal this very thinking and need to be challenged and exposed for the lie that they really are. Far from being a mirror that reveals our problems by reflection, the perfect expression of the beauty of God, His everlasting loving-kindness and faithfulness and passion is a means of exposing our true condition by contrast, not by reflection. While a mirror may be useful at times for a reality check, I believe that the analogy of a mirror is something more along the lines of our need to occasionally take an honest, hard look at our own hearts and admit the selfishness and depravity that lurks deep in our souls. But if we spend too much time dwelling on our own imperfections we will become overwhelmed with discouragement and will actually end up reinforcing them by our very act of dwelling on them. That is not to say we should live in self-denial and self-deception. Mirrors can be very useful if they are not overused. But to stare in pained realization at our sinfulness in a “mirror” will eventually cause those very imperfections and sins to take deeper root through the principle of feed-back. What James declares is our only hope is to stare obsessively and continuously at the perfect beauty of our Creator and Parent and by “beholding we will become changed”. It is an unavoidable law of the mind that whatever we focus our attention on will influence and shape our thinking and personality and character. And while I still believe it is important to experience “reality checks” rather frequently by looking into a mirror and seeing the truth about ourselves as far as where we are in our growing experience, we need to get away from the mirror without forgetting what we saw and spend much more time intensely saturating our minds with the mesmerizing attractions of the real truth about God and all the expressions of His character revealed in heaven and even in nature here on earth. This is my obligation to myself and to the One who died to give me eternal life. I am reminded of the passionate plea of Moses to the infantile people that he had grown to love so deeply. “"I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. So choose life in order that you may live, you and your descendants, by loving the LORD your God, by obeying His voice, and by holding fast to Him; for this is your life and the length of your days, that you may live...” (Deuteronomy 30:19-20)

Righteousness Defined

If righteousness is defined in the Bible as believing that God will do what He says He will do, then does that in turn apply to God's righteousness and if so, how? Is it possible that God's righteousness is defined the same way as the Bible defines our (true) righteousness?

If that is true, then it must look something like God trusting us to do what we say we can do. (I am exploring this while I am writing so I am not currently expressing something that I have uncovered or yet understand.) That seems to be what happened in what is called the Old Covenant. The people at Mt. Sinai claimed that they would do everything that God had said they must do. It's pretty obvious that was a complete failure and disaster. But still, God acted in a way all through the centuries that could easily be seen as trusting them to do what they claimed they could do even though He knew from before the start that it was impossible for them to do it.

This thread does seem to remain consistent right on into the New Covenant but with very important alterations. It seems to me that in a New Covenant relationship with God, to be “successful” we must become completely honest and admit that we cannot live a godly life ourself. In this situation from God's perspective it would be consistent with this definition of righteousness that God could still trust us to be what we say – that is, we will be consistent with our own claims. God is trusting us to do (and not do) what we say. So when we admit and agree with God (confess) that we are completely and utterly helpless to change ourselves and live a life that measures with the life of God, then God trusts us that we are in fact what we say we are and that our lives are consistent with what we are saying.

From that point we can move to the next which is called repentance which is a gift from God. Remember, the only thing we truly can do is choose who we are to be slaves to. We will never, ever be able to live godly lives independently like Satan has led us to believe. So our only hope of escape from this body of death is to throw ourselves on the mercy of the only Source of life and exercise our will to become His love-slaves. So when we choose to receive repentance, which means a change of thinking, of direction, of heart-motives, and live in that repentance by continual surrender of our rights to ourself, then the incredible arrangement of indwelling divinity accomplished by the death and resurrection of Jesus for this very purpose is installed in our soul and a new life is experienced within.

From this position we move on to an experience that theologians call “sanctification” which has its own hazards of misunderstanding. Very many people who seem to “get it right” up to this point fall into Old Covenant thinking at this stage and end up right back in the mire of struggle, defeat and “works religion” that plagues anyone attempting this route. It also puts God in the position, according to application of the above definition of righteousness, of trusting us to do the impossible which is just as impossible now as it was in Old Testament days. In essence, we are putting God in a terrible situation when we believe that we can be “good” through any efforts of our own, even when those efforts are supposedly combined with “help” from God.

In the experience of sanctification we must continue to remain in the same relationship with God as we did when we first came to Him for justification and trusted Him fully to apply the merits of Jesus to our lives in place of our sin and guilt. Sanctification is not discovering new formulas that will now enable us to live perfect lives with help from God. Sanctification is living in total consciousness of our continuing utter inability to live “right” at all from any of our own strength and instead resting fully in the resurrection power of an indwelling Divinity gifted to us in Jesus Christ. It is learning to live from the heart Jesus gives us.

When we live in that kind of relationship with God, then His trust in us to do what we say we can do – which is nothing but choose to allow Him to do what He says He can do in us – is a revelation of His righteousness. This is the gospel, the good news that Paul preached and was so pumped up about. This also allows the same definition of righteousness that is used by the Bible to equally apply both us and to God.

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith to faith; as it is written, "BUT THE RIGHTEOUS man SHALL LIVE BY FAITH." (Romans 1:16-17)

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How Am I Saved?

I received indirectly a response to my last post discussing Romans 1:17,18 that has got me thinking about more in there. This person emphasized that the important phrase in this text was about the righteous living by faith. He went on to assert that “the righteousness of God, which is trusting God, is revealed when we in fact trust God. This trust in God is what qualifies us for salvation, nothing more or less.”

I was raised in a religious environment that emphasized this belief so it is not new to me. However, based on what I have been learning over the past few years about the gospel and salvation, this assertion is starting to raise red flags in my mind. I in no way want to enter into a theological debate over the topic, but I do want to know what God's plan really is differentiated from any counterfeit that sounds very plausible, very religious or has been accepted by great numbers of people. I try to maintain an open mind and heart so that the Spirit of God can challenge and correct the many lies about God and His ways that permeate so much of religious beliefs, both in those around me and in myself.

In my search for truth, I am realizing that it has to stand the test of fitting into the heart in addition to passing intellectual tests using the Word of God as a virus check – test every spirit. The world is full of religious experts that can prove all sorts of notions about theology based on stringing together proof-texts, quotations, philosophy etc., but it is much more difficult to find people who are grounded in the Word but just as in earnest to live and grow in their heart-life and be open to learning from other people of like “mind”. I will say that some of the visitors to this blog site have blessed me with this perspective and spirit and are enriching my life.

So – I got sidetracked a little. As I was starting to say, I am quite uncomfortable with the statement above that could just as easily come from my own mouth only a few years ago. I am still learning more in this area and I do not want to make any dogmatic declarations, but based on my deeper understanding of what constitutes the gospel and salvation this explanation cannot work for me anymore. As I look at the context in this chapter, the message emerging is not the one expressed above but something quite different.

The core difference I believe, is where the source and origin is from – the initiative. “Religion” always wants to slip in some percentage of human performance no matter how small, into the mix. Paul was well aware of this penchant and took great pains to expose and denounce it. Unfortunately theologians have taken great pains to try to rationalize what he said to undo and confuse the very points he was trying to get across. Hence there is great confusion as to how we are saved and why. When we believe that our trust in God is what qualifies us for salvation, as I have been taught all my life and was again repeated in the above comment, then we in fact are inserting an ingredient of performance into the equation no matter how subtle it may seem. I have heard many of the arguments about this issue and I am sure this may heat some of them up again. But the Word, when properly understood both with the head and with the heart, simply does not support man helping out God in “saving” him.

Of course some of our problems come from starting with very different definitions for many of the words we are using in our discussions. This adds greatly to our confusion and is one of the major factors in heating up and extending arguments indefinitely. And even when the definitions are clearly spelled out it seems that others do not apply them when listening to repeated explanations. This again, I believe, is a symptom of disconnected hearts and an over-emphasis on left-brain arguments that sometimes demand to be “right” at all costs.

To present what I believe I am seeing here as the real message about faith in relation to salvation, I would like to start out by saying that there is a great difference between “having” faith and exercising faith. I know that at first glance that sounds ridiculous and it certainly exposes the problem of condensing heart concepts down into English words. But in my experience “having faith” always carried with it the subtle implication that somehow I had to work up enough “faith” to convince God to do whatever it was I was trying to have faith about. Usually in my mind the idea of faith was simply believing hard enough that what I wanted God to do would really happen and blocking out any and all doubts from my mind that might give God reason to refuse my request because I didn't have pure enough faith. That's stating it from a heart-perspective more than a mind perspective, but I don't think I am alone in that perception. Most of the religious world is trying to get God to do all sorts of things for them and trying to “use” God to force circumstances and/or other people to their own advantage. Then when God doesn't deliver what they want they assume they didn't have enough “faith”. This even opens up great opportunities for the enemy of God to step in and provide the supernatural power they are looking for and in the process they are deceived into believing that they have “the truth” because their prayers and faith seem to be “working” and they are being “blessed by God”.

I learned something yesterday about faith that made much more sense to me than this typical approach so familiar to us. It was pointed out to me that most of the references in the New Testament to faith in relation to Jesus are referring to HIS faith instead of ours. Different translations of the Bible render it differently depending on the translator's bias, but the original language as well as the contexts support a reading of “the faith OF Jesus” rather than “faith IN Jesus” as is so commonly thought.

This opens up a whole new realm of possibilities and insights from the Word. That is a subject for another study, but it has strong implications for this passage. Let me quote the verses I am looking at here.

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith to faith; as it is written, "BUT THE RIGHTEOUS man SHALL LIVE BY FAITH." For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, (Romans 1:16-18 NAS95)

Looking at the interconnections of these phrases I see the “gospel” as the focal point of everything else surrounding it in the text. It is the gospel that is described as the power of God. It is the gospel that is the revelation of the righteousness of God. It is the gospel that is lived out by those with faith. And it is the gospel that is the truth that is suppressed by those who are ungodly and unrighteous.

Since the gospel is defined as “the power of God for salvation”, then it would be very helpful to know what salvation means. Again, we are diverted by the commonly held assumption that salvation is all about getting us to heaven so we don't have to live in discomfort and pain in this sinful world anymore. Face it, that's the underlying belief of most of us though it seems crass to express it that way. If we honestly think about the way most people preach and teach about salvation today, you have to conclude that salvation is centered on human beings and God is just the external Force that must alternately be appeased or induced to make us feel better and get us out of our mess. This is sick and selfish thinking but, in reality, lies at the foundation of most religious systems, thinking and teaching.

What we desperately need is a much bigger perspective on what is really going on. We need the eyes of heaven to see the real issues and keep in mind the much larger controversy over the battle about God's reputation. That too, is another discussion that I try to address on my other web site but am only referring to for context. Our biggest problem is that our view of the gospel and salvation is so small and so self-focused that it corrupts our theology without our realizing it. That is why we find ourselves looking at these verses and putting the emphasis on living by faith (self-focused religion) instead of receiving the revelation of God thereby entering into an experience of real power in our lives.

I am beginning to sense that one of our big problems is our broken “receiver”. One of the tasks of maturity for an infant is learning to receive, and many of us never learned that very well. I know I certainly didn't, and it has been a serious problem for me all of my life. I believe this is a core problem in our relationship with God as well. We are so conditioned and determined that we must give something, that somehow we must do something to EARN, that it filters into our relationship with God and we contaminate the gospel with our faulty thinking and assumptions; hence, our emphasis more on our faith than on accepting the revealing of God's righteousness.

That triggers an even bigger block for understanding this passage because the word “righteousness” is possibly one of the most misunderstood words in the English language. That is not surprising though, because the core problem of the whole great controversy is our misconceptions and lies about what God is really like. So as long as we don't have healthy and truthful concepts of the truth about God we will equally have misunderstandings about the true meaning of the word righteousness.

This passage gives us a window into the true meaning of the word by telling us that, whatever it is, righteousness is revealed in the gospel, and the word gospel simply means the “good news”. If we take the definitions that I have on my definition page and apply them in this passage, it might read something like this –

I am not ashamed of the good news about God, for the good news is that the power to salvage us, to restore us to our original design and function is released in our lives when we begin believing the truth about God. This can happen first in those who have had a better picture of God to start with, but it will also happen in the hearts of everyone else as well who enter into this relationship by accepting and believing the truth about God.

In this good news about God, we find the righteousness of God – His faith and love – revealed which inspires faith within us that responds to His faith in us. It has already been stated in the Old Testament that real righteousness, people who want to be righteous, live in this relationship of spontaneous faith created within their heart in response to God's amazing love and faith in us.

On the other hand, the “wrath” of God, that misunderstood passionate love that appears so threatening to those who don't believe in His faith and love, is revealed from heaven to be working in a different direction from those who resist it. Everyone who refuses to respond to God's love and be brought into harmony with His faith and love for them, who suppress this truth about Him and cling to Satan's lies about God will experience the natural consequences of that resistance that they will believe to be “wrath”.

What I see here is an issue of getting my receiver fixed by God so that faith can more easily be produced in me spontaneously in response to the faith of Jesus in me. Jesus had so much faith in us that He took the immense risk of eternal death, took upon Himself all of the consequences of pain and suffering that happens when we resist God's power of love, and let all that sin and its effects kill Him through unfathomable internal torture while externally wicked men tortured His body and mind on the cross. He did this in faith that some of us would see enough of His love for us that we would allow Him to work and live in our hearts and restore us to the original intimacy and family relationship that God originally created us for.

If I am willing to believe with my heart that God indeed has this kind of love, that He is passionate about restoring me into close association and fellowship with the Godhead, that He trusts me enough to give me complete freedom to choose His love without any coercion, to even go so far as to offer an arrangement of marriage to God and all the privileges that that implies – then I will discover that faith will grow spontaneously in my heart, which was designed for this very purpose. I will discover that if I receive first, then I will find myself beginning to give to others and back to God.

But nothing that I give has anything whatsoever to do with “saving” me. That is absolutely preposterous! The only thing I can do to participate in salvation is to exercise my power of choice to give Him permission and authority to live in my heart and face the mirror of my heart in His direction. I surrender my “rights” to myself and abandon myself to His love, just as lovers give themselves unreservedly to each other in the act of making love. In that surrender I will find the abundant life that is found only in connecting to the one true Source of life. “For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.” (Matthew 16:25)

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River of Joy

Why, if we can be carried along by a surging current of God's passion, does it seem so easy to be distracted by illicit diversions? I thought of the rocks and obstacles that are found in white-water rapids and then remembered what happens when the water level is too low. The less water there is the more difficult it is to get downstream and the easier it is to get hung up on the rocks and debris.

The thought then came to me that the river is joy – yet another fine analogy for this most important ingredient of life. And this too would explain why it is so urgent that we raise our level of joy as we near the end of time. Satan has strategically placed all sorts of obstacles in our riverbed, some of them quite sharp and some quite large. Many times they seem to be insurmountable, but that is because our water level of joy and intimacy with God is so low that we have to get up and carry our raft much of the way. We seem content to just enjoy ankle-deep levels of the joy of the Lord and think that all this work and all these “trials” are just what must be normal and we have to just live with it.

But I believe God's plan and desire for us is to open the floodgates of heaven by opening our hearts to become open channels for His love and passion to flow through us. Then we will discover to our amazement that many of the seemingly insurmountable obstacles in our path before have disappeared underwater and we find ourself riding the wild whitewater with abandon and excitement as we rest deeper and deeper in the confidence of God's love and protection.

If temptations seem to be overwhelming, faith to be always just out of reach and depression and discouragement seem to be too often destroying all our peace, I would venture to say that a strong indulgence in our hearts being ravished in the passion of God just might change our perspective a great deal and even elevate us from being slammed around by rocks and obstacles to riding the waves with the thrill of adventure. We might even look forward to the trials and learn to rejoice in them as we are instructed in James if we saw them all as opportunities for making our ride exciting. And that is all very much dependent on how much joy we allow to pass through the gates of our hearts.

Judging - Mirror or Light?

It has been something of a mystery for years why Paul asserts in Romans 2 that when we judge others we are guilty of the same things. I have heard many explanations and expositions and declarations about this but they always left me dissatisfied. Maybe my mind works too simple, but I have felt there must be some way of understanding this better.

Lately an analogy has come to me that seems to fit. I like analogies as people probably notice who have listened to me lately. While analogies usually fall short of complete explanation and may fall apart if taken to an extreme, they can also be very useful in translating concepts that are better understood by the heart into language which is primarily the function of the mind.

The passage I have been meditating on is Romans 2:1-4. It must always be remembered clearly that the chapter breaks were not part of the original text and many times disrupt our ability to get into what the original author was trying to convey. This is indeed the case here as well. These comments by Paul are in the context of Romans 1 and all the things presented there about the two “sides” of God being revealed: righteousness and wrath.

I like the way this reads from the Bible in Basic English. It goes like this –

“So you have no reason, whoever you are, for judging: for in judging another you are judging yourself, for you do the same things. And we are conscious that God is a true judge against those who do such things. But you who are judging another for doing what you do yourself, are you hoping that God's decision will not take effect against you? Or is it nothing to you that God had pity on you, waiting and putting up with you for so long, not seeing that in his pity God's desire is to give you a change of heart?” (Romans 2:1-4 BBE)

The New American Standard Bible that I study from reads as follows –

“Therefore you have no excuse, everyone of you who passes judgment, for in that which you judge another, you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things. And we know that the judgment of God rightly falls upon those who practice such things. But do you suppose this, O man, when you pass judgment on those who practice such things and do the same yourself, that you will escape the judgment of God? Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?” (Romans 2:1-4 NAS95)

What I am starting to see emerging as I have contemplated this longer and dialogged with God about it is that obviously there is a major difference between humans judging each other and God judging humans. It seems quite plain from the passage, though very baffling to most of us when applied to ourselves, that when we judge others for the “bad” things they do we are guilty of the same things ourselves. That is the part that I have struggled with for most of my life. It just seemed very illogical to claim that every time I judge someone for something I see in them that I am the same as they are.

I have over the years noticed more and more that the things I notice in others, the weaknesses and failings that seem to stand out for me, invariable show up sooner or later in my own life, albeit often in a different form or style. This has caused me to restrain myself more and more in my penchant for condemning others though it is still a great temptation. Many have settled on this principle as the full explanation for this passage. People in AA have a saying that goes, “if you spot it, you got it”. This is a very true fact of reality in how human beings are wired; we see most easily in others the weaknesses that plague our own lives.

But if that principle is equally applied to verse two then we introduce another major problem not so easy to explain. How can God “judge” people without having the same discrepancy that is seen when we judge them? I cannot except the arbitrary “religious” solution of simply saying God cannot sin or some other such declarations that shut down any exploration of this concept. I believe that there is a truth here that can be clearly understood and that will help us grow both in our understanding of our own nature and in the beauty of God's perfect character.

First of all I realized there might be a difference between the “judging” that we do and the “judging” that God does. Generally when we judge someone for their faults and sins we do it while infected with a spirit of condemnation. We are in fact projecting onto them the secret or not so secret feelings of guilt and pain we are feeling and want to draw attention away from ourselves onto others in a subconscious attempt to relieve our own uneasiness. This in fact is the process that I just discussed. But when God “judges” we must be extremely careful not to project onto Him the same motives and context that we are so familiar with inside ourselves. He has stated very emphatically, “'For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,' declares the LORD. 'For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways And My thoughts than your thoughts.'” (Isaiah 55:8-9) That is one reason I like the way the BBE renders this as a “decision” by God rather than a “judgment”. It conveys the idea that what He is doing is not the same as what we do that carries with it a spirit of condemnation.

Our paradigm of projecting onto God our own perspective has been much of the cause of most of our crazy ideas about God, about His character and motives. Many popular and deeply entrenched beliefs and doctrines could be traced back to contamination from this source. Because we view God through human passions and paradigms we tend to mold Him into our image instead of accepting the truth about Himself that He wants to reveal to us through His word and His Spirit. This passage is a good illustration of God's efforts to reveal the real truth about Himself if we will take the time to meditate and receive higher truth as we lay aside our preconceived beliefs and listen to a new and thrilling revelation of the heart of the Almighty.

The analogy that I see here that helps me understand this more clearly is that of a mirror. There are several places in the Bible that use this concept directly and indirectly. I have been learning that we are all like mirrors; we reflect to others whatever it is that we focus on, whatever we fill our minds and hearts with, whatever direction we aim our mirror. If we focus on the faults of others we find ourselves becoming those faults. That's one reason I am becoming more and more reticent to listen to the media and the news as much as I used to because I see that it produces within my heart emotions and reactions that are most unhealthy and even destructive.

But God is not a mirror, although when we create a heart-belief about God in our own image we come to believe that He in fact does mirror our own emotions and characteristics. But, in fact, God is in reality not a mirror but the ultimate source of all light. A mirror cannot even be useful if there is not an external source of light which it can reflect. That is an amazing thought in itself that usually escapes us. But that is why when God “judges”, it is so different than when we judge. When God judges it is simply a “revealing” of what is, not an arbitrary decision or accusation. When God comes near, His very presence reveals what is true just as a light exposes more and more detail of anything we look at as a bright light comes closer and closer to it.

When Paul asks the question in verse 3 about religious people thinking they can escape the judgment of God while judging others, it is like he is asking how a mirror can escape being discovered itself in the presence of light. And to carry it logically farther, if a mirror is directed toward the sins of someone else when the light is turned on, what will be seen in the mirror is those very sins – not a very good position to find ourselves in the the day of revealing (judgment).

But the really exciting discovery in this passage is the revelation of what God's light looks like. It is found in verse 4 and should be the focus of our mirrors if we want to come into harmony with God so we will be ready when He appears in glory. The solution for us and for those we tend to judge is the same – repentance motivated by the “riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience”. For contrary to popular religious thinking, it is not fear and intimidation and terror that leads us to repentance; it is the kindness and love and tenderness of God that draws us into His embrace of forgiveness and empowering presence.

And if we continue to disbelieve this truth about God? Then the unavoidable consequences will be the effects of resistance being stored up within our hearts against His kindness and love called the “wrath” of God as stated in verse 5. It is not wrath as we normally think of wrath from a human perspective except that it will seem like it is because we have locked our minds into believing that God is just like us and will stubbornly insist that He is the one who is hurting us. We will resent Him and accuse Him and join with the enemy of God, the greatest liar in the universe, in charging God with atrocities that, in fact dwell in the heart of Satan and all his demonic kingdom.

The alternative to this is to live in the truth about God and grow in knowledge of His true character. This is the experience described in verse 7, “those who by perseverance in doing good seek for glory and honor and immortality, eternal life.” (Romans 2:7)

(next in series)

Resisting the Current

Wrath/power is revealed by the effects of resisting it.

Sin is transgression – resisting, living at cross-purposes with God's ways.

If you are enjoying white-water rapids flowing with the current you can have the thrill of being carried along with the powerful, surging water beneath you. But if you “dig in your heels” locking yourself to a rock or even trying to move cross-wise to the current, you will suddenly find yourself in realization of how intensely powerful and dangerous the water can be if you are not willing to move in synchronization with it.

The last half of Romans 1 is describing this very situation in contrast to the first half describing the very opposite. The identification of each is found in back to back verses 17 and 18 - “the righteousness of God is revealed”, and “the wrath of God is revealed”. Reading all the previous verses before 17 reveals the righteousness of God. Reading the following verses reveals the wrath of God.

But unlike the typical spin that most people assume by projecting their own feelings of wrath onto God's character, what in fact is revealed here is the natural consequences of resisting the powerful current of God's intense passion of love.

Just as trying to stop in the middle of a surging river or even move in a different direction suddenly and dramatically produces life-threatening danger, resistance to the power of God's love and His ways of relating produces life-destroying results. Why then do we blame God/the current for the dangerous consequences of our resistance when we could be enjoying the most exhilarating ride of our lives? In fact, this very penchant to blame God and accuse Him of arbitrarily imposing these “punishments” on those who resist Him in itself will put us in the path of resisting Him. If we chose to continue to blame God for sin's effects we will tragically find ourselves suffering those very effects. And the sad consequence will be that our conclusions will seem to be justified while in fact we are only living under the intense deception of sin and the lies that reinforce it.

Notice what Romans 1 really says about how God's “wrath” is revealed. I notice two important principles emerging here: (1) “they knew God” (v. 21), and (2) “God gave them over”, or released them. These are repeated in various ways throughout the rest of this chapter. What it is saying, to use our current analogy is that (1) they cannot help but notice that there is a strong current underneath their lives and that it is consistently urging them in a particular direction. But when they chose to “exchange” the real for the imitation (v. 23) and refused to “acknowledge God”, then in respect for their choice to resist the current of His love and passion for them God, in the intense anguish of His breaking heart for them “gives them over” to the terrible natural consequences of their stubborn resistance.

Just in case we glibly smile believing that we are safe from that problem, Paul goes on in chapter 2 to point out that when we harbor “judgment” in our hearts against others who are suffering these results of resisting the current we place ourselves in the same situation and will unwittingly find ourselves in the same danger as the ones we condemn.

I want to explore this much more but right now I want to sit in a raft and relish the sun and the spray in my face as the current of God's love surrounds me and carries me through this day.

(next in series)

Touch

Yesterday I spent all day in a seminar from Family Foundations Intl. called Overcoming Anger. It is a very powerful seminar and one that I highly recommend to everyone; it is not just for people who have obvious problems with anger.

As with all their seminars, they have small group prayer ministry between most of the presentations to allow opportunity for people to receive ministry for an issues that may be raised during the presentation. I find this a very effective format that is much better than the left-brain heavy seminars that most people are familiar with. Since this particular event was planned for only those who have been in training to be facilitators for future seminars, everyone there was familiar with the routine and the guidelines for these sessions. During one of the ministry sessions I attended the issue of touch came up and what is or is not appropriate in these settings.

This brief exchange got my mind stirred up to explore this issue in the Bible for myself. So this morning I got on my computer and searched the whole New Testament for every reference to touch that I could find. The results surprised me more than I expected.

What I found was that Jesus touched people a great deal more than many of us may even be comfortable with; and these are only the instances that were so significant that they were noted by the recorders of His story. I am sure they were many other times that were so common that they were simply accepted as normal for Him to do. But the real surprise came when I looked up the original word in Greek to see what its meaning is and discovered an important link back to the concept of “fire” that has been a subject of study for me recently.

The word translated “touch” in most places is the Greek word “haptomai”, with the following definition:

680. reflexive of 681; properly, to attach oneself to, i.e. to touch (in many implied relations):--touch.

Notice that it says this word is reflexive of 681. When I went to see the definition of 681 this is what I found:

681. hapto, a primary verb; properly, to fasten to, i.e. (specially) to set on fire:--kindle, light.

What I am seeing here is a description of touching that is far more than a casual or incidental touch. It is a touch that is connected with the idea or sensation of being set on fire or communication of power. I also found a few references to people wanting to touch Jesus or His garment with the same kind of touch, so this form of touch is not restricted to the touch of God. There were also references to touch that used different Greek words that did not have this meaning and were not associated with the idea of power but more like we think of just touching something.

As I looked through the New Testament at every reference to this word, I was very interested in the very last reference in the Bible. It is this text found in 1 John 5:18.

“We know that no one who is born of God sins; but He who was born of God keeps him, and the evil one does not touch him.”

This really caught my interest. The message I see here is tied directly to the concepts I have been learning about the “wrath” of God and correct understandings about “fire” and “hell” that I have been researching. I have begun to collect these thoughts on my new blog site called Surprise Ending. The message that I see in all these references is that we need to be in touch with God in a way that will both bring “fire” into our lives and will make us agents to pass it along to others. And the exciting part about this is that when we are in that kind of relationship with God, one that is filled with the fire of His passion, one that is referred to in 1 John as “born of God”, then the evil one cannot touch us with his fiery touch. That to me is really good news.

Deferring to Another Post

Though I have a lot of things going through my head today, particularly as I am trying to get in touch with my heart and head in preparation for the upcoming Bat Barakah in two weeks; instead I am going to recommend another blog post that just enriched my heart this morning when I read it. I have been following this site for quite a few months since I stumbled across it and have enjoyed reading her posts about her life as a research assistant in Brazil. There have been great stories and pictures and insights into her mind that have kept me coming back to check on her regularly, though I never left a comment. But the most recent post from last Friday really spoke to me and I highly recommend it to anyone reading this today. Her name is Maria Susannah Bowman and you can read it on her site by clicking here.

Slandering God

The message in My Utmost this morning was again timed perfectly to address the issues of my heart right now. I have been under pressure to worry, to forget who I am inside, to give in to fear and panic as the date for the Bat-Barakah rushes in and almost nothing is getting done or even planned yet. Those around me are starting to doubt my sincerity about this and, as I suspected from the start a couple weeks ago, the devil is arranging all sorts of external, “important” distractions to keep me occupied. I delivered the THIRD transmission to the shop to get my daughter's car fixed while my other vehicles have serious problems of their own, my multiple jobs are creating pressure to stay busy paying attention to them, other very consuming interests are asserting themselves to my mind and the cat punctured my air mattress the other day so that I lost a lot of sleep slowly sinking to the floor all night until I had to get up at 4 AM to replace it with another. This is only to provide a glimpse of where I am inside right now for context. Yes, there is a lot of pressure to worry and stress about all these competing priorities, but this is nothing new and is experienced by everyone. It is my choices and reactions during all of this that determines the direction and outcome and whether I mature more or regress into the dark tombs of fear and depression. I believe this may be the fight referred to by Paul and the “fight of faith”. I would like to remind myself of some key phrases that God presented to me this morning as reinforcement for His plans to protect and guide my heart today. They are all from today's selection in My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers that I quote from so often. “It is possible for us to misjudge our capacity.... We must not measure our spiritual capacity by education or by intellect; our capacity in spiritual things is measured by the promises of God. If we get less than God wants us to have, before long we will slander Him....” First of all, this reminded me of the “joy capacity” that Dr. Wilder teaches about. Joy capacity is a very real function of our brain and is increased physically by experiences of joy, of people being glad to be together. It is also the very same part of the brain that handles stress and trauma. It is like a flexible bucket in our brain designed for multiple functions. If it is not big enough for the trauma we experience, then our mind will resort to all sorts of other tricks to cope with the experience and hide it away until our “joy bucket” grows to enough capacity to be used to process it effectively. What I find intriguing here is tying our capacity to the immense resources of the promises of God. Failing to establish this connection between our inner life and the external resource of God's powerful promises will always result in anger and slander toward God, holding Him responsible and blaming Him for all our problems. We will end up saying, “'You expect more than You give me power to do; You demand too much of me, I cannot stand true to You where I am placed.' When it is a question of God's Almighty Spirit, never say 'I can't.' Never let the limitation of natural ability come in. If we have received the Holy Spirit, God expects the work of the Holy Spirit to be manifested in us.” That is very strong medicine, but I need it right now. I believe that I am being led by the Spirit even though I am very wobbly at many times. God has promised to do His “thing” in me and I hold Him to His promise. I also firmly believe He has arranged and prompted us to plan and go through with this important event in the lives of our daughter's and I want to stay in cooperation with His leading. Most importantly I want to keep my own spirit in line with His Spirit during the process. The next section touches on something I have been thinking about off and on for several days. I have made the observation to a few friends that it seems to me like anger is always directly related to a perception of unfairness, whether actual or not. Unfairness is linked directly to justice and if followed through fully will always end up back at anger toward God for His perceived injustice toward us. While many people do not express it that way, if it were revealed I believe that is what would be found inside their heart. This next paragraph reinforced that idea and really flushed it out more clearly. “The servant (Matt. 25 parable) justified himself in everything he did and condemned his lord on every point – 'Your demand is out of all proportion to what you give.' Have we been slandering God by daring to worry when He has said; 'Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you?' Worrying means exactly what this servant implied – 'I haven't had a decent chance,' and the one who is lazy spiritually is captious with God. Lazy people always strike out on an independent line.” This is a very important principle for me to remember. Worry equals slander! So the reality of it is that every time I am tempted to worry I am really being tempted to slander God, His attitude toward me and His ability to take care of me. I certainly do not want to find myself in a position of slandering God, but I also have to admit that I really am in that position far too often. Making it clear in this way helps me to see the real issues at stake and reminds me of what is really going on. It removes one more layer of deception that the enemy has had over me most of my life. One more point I would like to share that I have also been discussing with my friends related to this. I have observed that self-justifying is never a part of God's way of living. Not only does God ask us not to justify ourselves, He also never justifies Himself. I know that sounds like heresy, but if we think about it carefully I think we will find it to be true. That is why all through the Bible God talks about us as being His witnesses. God is conducting His part in the Great War between good and evil in such a way so that ultimately He will be justified by His creatures without resorting to defending Himself. That is one of the underlying principles of existence that has been twisted and distorted by sin. Our selfish hearts naturally tend to justify ourselves at every opportunity and therefore we assume that God operates the same way. But if we consider carefully God's ways I believe we will discover that true justification always has to come from another. The real catch in this is that when we resort to self-justifying and defending ourselves, which comes oh so naturally and spontaneously, we actually are precluding God being able to justify us by His grace. That is why the only way we can stand justified before God is by confession and repentance which are the exact opposite of defensiveness and self-justification. That is the irony of the gospel; the only way one can obtain justification is to resist justifying one's self. Self-justification is resistance toward God and His offer of redemption. And as I am learning more and more, resistance in the presence of power results in heat, pain and ultimately death. “But the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ His Son.”

What Must I Do to be Salvaged?

“'Sirs, what must I do to be saved?' They said, 'Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household.' And they spoke the word of the Lord to him together with all who were in his house.” Acts 16:30-32. I found myself asking God this very question this morning. Then I was reminded to think of what the words mean and how that might sound using their more accurate meaning. Since “saved” and “salvation” are the same, and the root meaning is “restoration, returning to an original design and function”, then I see that “doing” something and getting restored to my original design and function are the main elements of this question. Generally speaking, when we ask what we should “do”, the question is coming from the context of our left-brain, external-oriented religious thinking, even if we are not known as being necessarily religious to other people. Religious people do not have a corner on living fake lives. It is our natural response to an exposure of the emptiness of our heart that has been nagging us all our life but we could not satisfy it or even understand it correctly until we see someone else living from their heart in joyful fulfillment. Then our own heart screams out in agony of desperation and we become more aware of how empty we really are and how deep our heart hunger really is. Consider the people who approached Jesus with basically the same question. “Teacher, what good thing shall I do that I may obtain eternal life?” Matt. 19:16. “Good Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?” Mark 10:17, Luke 10:25 and 18:18. As I was waking up this morning I couldn't miss the intense hunger of my heart awakened last night when I watched “Tuesdays with Morrie” at a friend's house with friends and family. It has stirred up awareness of how selfish I am, of how much the faults in others that irritate me are only reflections of how I must irritate them. The self-deception of my own hypocrisy is so effective that I find it impossible to see much of the truth about myself and of course cannot receive it from others attempting to tell me about it. But the heart is communicated to by example and demonstration, not with words and logic. Thus my heart was able to at least slightly communicate back to my brain how empty it is as I watched the actions, spirit and transparent unselfishness of Morrie in the way he related to the self-absorbed young man swallowed up by the typical distractions and busyness of hectic living, too distracted to be able to receive or give love with anyone. I saw myself portrayed painfully accurately in the example of the young man far more than in the character of Morrie. And my heart cries out, “What must I do to be saved?” I realize even more now how helpless I am to change myself. My only hope is outside, supernatural intervention by a Power that can transform me from a selfish, pride-filled, self-deceived nice guy (many would even dispute the nice guy part) to a genuine, caring, loving and expressive man with a servant heart spontaneously reaching out to touch the hearts of everyone around me. In the answer of Paul and Silas to the jailer who found himself asking this same question after having his own callous heart awakened by their startling behavior under persecution and abuse; their answer alerts me to the underlying basis for hope. It is not an intellectual answer, though it has often been degraded to that in religious teaching. It is a heart answer – belief in Jesus, the Creator and original Designer who created our hearts and is the only One who knows how to really satisfy them and restore them to their original design and function. Believing in Jesus involves trusting His motives and integrity and passion as well as His ability to change me. This kind of trust does not insist on knowing ahead of time how He will do it or having every question about His past dealings with me answered before I let Him have His way with me. Believing means that I let go of my resistance to Him and allow Him access to my emotions, my pain, my fears and my shame. Believing in God is not the same as believing facts and doctrines about God. That is a left-brain function and often blocks us from allowing our hearts access to true faith. Real faith/belief is a heart response as well as a choice to allow our heart to come out in the open and take the ultimate risk of self-abandonment. In so doing we are promised that we will find true life, true heart-satisfaction, real fulfillment and joy. But now my left brain analytical thinking is hijacking what my heart was trying to express and my heart is complaining that it is being ignored again. That is what a lot of people around me have been feeling as well. My mind wants to find a nice, tidy answer to wind up this post so it will conform to literary expectations and social norms. But my heart wants to scream, “What must I do to be saved, to be alive, to thrive and connect and bond with other hearts around me like I was designed for?”

A Tragic Exchange - round 1

Rom. 1:21-25 The tragic exchange. This is in the context of the revealing of God's wrath. (v.18) Professing to be wise, they became fools. This is a classic description of a person who has shifted their focus from a heart-based relationship with God demonstrated in honoring Him and giving thanks (v.21) to living in left-brain speculations resulting in the heart going dark. This implies that previously the heart was not dark but was designed to be full of light, of fire, of passion in a vital connection with the ultimate Lover. Professing to be wise... This is more description of the cause that results in the tragic results further described in this chapter. This is likely one of the most subtle and effective deceptions that Satan uses on us. Because this profession of being wise entrenches us in self-justification and defensiveness blocking all attempts to reveal the truth about our cold, darkened hearts. Exchanged the glory of the incorruptible God for and image in the form of.... Notice what is exchanged for what. Glory is let go of to receive an image. An image of what? What is an image? What is glory? Be careful not to assume the answers too quickly and rush on. Allow the text to contribute to the real meaning of the words it uses and still maintain an open mind even then. It seems to me that the image is the counterpart or counterfeit of the glory, since the enemy is into counterfeiting everything that is true. We lose most of the significance and application to our own lives of this powerful passage when we brush off the reference to image as being carved idols worshiped by weak-minded people. I don't believe that a physical image is the primary issue revealed here. That is not our great danger. What is the real problem is looking to anything or anyone as a source of life instead of an intimate, dynamic, growing vital connection with the only true God. Exchanging real glory for an image is exactly like looking to pornography for pleasure in place of enjoying the ultimate sexual experiences in the context of a healthy, exciting and deeply bonded marriage relationship. The first is a self-destructive and very poor imitation, an “image” of the glory of the second. The text goes on to reinforce this truth even more. God gave them over in the lusts of their hearts... This is not an arbitrary act of a God that is offended by sinners and determined to punish them in retaliation as is so commonly thought. This is the reality of a spurned lover finally relinquishing and releasing a determined person stubbornly rejecting all attempts at reconciliation. It is acknowledging and sadly respecting the decision of the other to permanently break off an intimate, healthy relationship for a twisted, lifestyle of indulgence and and self-destruction. It is a parallel to exchanging the truth of God for a lie (v.25). This is just a preliminary note to be explored much deeper when I have more time. (next in series)

Thoughts About Blessing

Miscellaneous thoughts about blessing and identity. Psalm 145 seems to hold a definition of what blessing is. Blessing unlocks resources and authority in the supernatural realm. Prophecy in blessing is God's view, God's picture of life and character that reflects His image. Is God like our false identity, the one we usually think we really are, or like something very different beyond what we allow ourself to imagine? Blessing is re-speaking God's creative words of identity, speaking true identity into existence. A blessing is like impregnating the womb of the heart with the sperm of God's power and identity that combines with the latent seed of our unique individuality to create and bring to life our true identity. The health of this new life, our true identity in Christ, is affected by the nourishment we bring to it. It may not be even obvious for a time like a growing embryo in the womb of a woman, but if we allow it to grow and protect and nourish it, it will come to birth and come out in the open sooner or later as a revealing to the watching world of who we really are designed to be. It is the revelation of our true destiny. As earthly parents we repeatedly fail to properly relate to our children, to feed their hearts with affection and to see them through the eyes of God. But even though we are often faithless He is always faithful regardless of what appearances and feelings insist. Even when we have imparted cursing and been a source of death instead of life, He will continue to pour out yet more grace. While we have tragically misrepresented Him and defamed His reputation, He continues to love and forgive and passionately pursue not only our children but us as well. Allow Him to love you effectively. Worldly economics promises a counterfeit salvation; we think we need money to restore us to our real potential, to empower us to realize our true identity. It uses fear of failure and shame as a counterfeit of faith.

Mind vs. Heart Religion

The mind is the gateway to the heart, the outer court surrounding the inner sanctuary. What is allowed to fill the mind determines the atmosphere that the heart breathes, the diet that the heart is fed which in turn affects the health or weakness of the heart. A religion isolated to the mind does not have the truth and power of heart-based religion because it is not based on true reality. But heart-based religion submerged in a mind kept full of shallow thinking and junk food is a religion of emotionalism and self-pleasing that also is not based on the truth of heaven. Just like you don't feed your physical heart directly, but provide nutrients through the digestive tract and into the blood that determines the health of your heart; just so the mind and imagination and senses are the input points from which the heart draws its strength or is debilitated. Taking drugs to feel good may seem to be satisfying for a few moments but may take years off the usefulness of the heart. Indulging in sin-laced entertainment and pleasure-producing mental and physical activities that are not in harmony with heaven may make us feel good repeatedly in the short-term but continuously weakens the affections and attachments of our heart to God which is the one important criteria that determines our entrance into heaven according to the parable of the sheep and the goats.

Where to find Jesus' Face

As I lay in bed this morning slowly waking up with various worries and relationships beginning to run through my mind, I started turning them over to God and asking Him questions as I often do early in the day. Memories from last night's mens group, my transmission that I very well might have damaged trying to drag 2 tons of manure in a trailer into my garden with my van, the challenge of preparing my heart and mind for the upcoming Blessing event, how to get my heart to open more toward my wife and kids.... The transmission problem (not the one currently being installed in my daughter's car) really began to weigh me down with familiar feelings of panic. After being suckered into self-deprecation and false feelings of guilt for awhile, I finally remembered that God was not taken by surprise by this development nor is He upset with me as my feelings (or false gods) may suggest. But to have any peace I will need to come into His presence with my problem and stay there long enough to let it go and trust Him with it. I reminded Him immediately that He has indicated that nothing that in any way disturbs my peace is too small for Him to notice, and this definitely affects my peace. I began praying for heaven's perspective on this issue and for help to pry my mental fingers off this problem so He could take ownership of it. I also began praying for the eyes of heaven to see differently each person that was coming through my consciousness. I began rehearsing my usual petitions - to show me His face and to cause me to die to self and be crucified with Christ. I try to understand a little better what that means for me each time I pray it so it does not slip into another habit of mindless repetitions. When I sincerely asked God to come and live in my heart today, I suddenly was surprised by a revelation into my heart that fully woke me up and got me excited. We have been instructed to seek God's face - that is His desire for us. I have also been learning the importance of living from the heart and have been making baby steps into that experience over the past few years. But the two ideas suddenly met each other in a way I had not seen before. If I ask Jesus to live in my heart and He takes me up on the offer, then maybe I need to learn to see my heart more clearly if I want to see His face better. For if indeed He is living there, then it only makes sense that I might very well be able to see His face there, or at least a portion of His face that is uniquely shaped to reveal and energize my true identity. As I pondered this insight I also realized that the more I learn to honestly live from my heart and recognize His face there, the more capacity I will develop to perceive and see into other people's hearts. And if the face of God is only seen through the pinhole of our hearts uniquely synchronized to satisfy our deepest longings and desires, then the more I look at other people's hearts along with my own the broader and bigger will become the outline of His face. It sort of resonates with the old Indian story of the blind men and the elephant who all could only perceive and report "truth" from their very limited yet somewhat accurate perspective. None of them were completely wrong, but to know the real truth about the elephant they had to be willing to think beyond their narrow field of input. This truth reinforced my need to continue to learn to live in and from my heart even more. And as I increase my hear-awareness and capacity, the result will be an ever-increasing ability to observe, connect and care for others hearts as my picture of God continues to expand. The gifts to the church in 1 Corinthians are really like pixels on a giant screen that when seen together dynamically reveal the movie picture of God in action and a little bit of His immense passion. Then God reminded me what happened yesterday with my van when it wouldn't start (again) in the parking lot at the Post Office. I had crawled underneath to tap on the starter which had always worked before but not this time. I then solicited a passerby to try to start it while I lay underneath beating on it but to no avail. As I noticed my frustration began to rise I began praying and wondering what God might have in this experience that I would later look back on and appreciate. So I decided not to get worked up about it so I wouldn't have all that unnecessary fretting to feel ashamed of later. I called a friend and he suggested trying to jump straight from the battery to the starter. I had already checked the batter connections and had even tried to jump the relay but with no results. So I crawled back under the van with a paper towel to clean off the starter connections and see what my options were. As I wiped off the starter wires I noticed with some concern that there was an unusual amount of fluid clinging to the bottom of the oil pan and transmission. I wasn't sure where it was coming from, but I carefully looked it over for a minute storing it in my memory for further analysis. Then I also noticed that a small wire had come loose while I was wiping off the starter. When I tried to re-attach it, it was still very loose. At that point I realized that I might have discovered the root problem of the starter occasionally failing, though I was not yet sure. i retrieved some pliers from inside the van and slid back under to tighten up the spade connecter so it would grip better and the reconnected it. Sure enough, when I tried to start the engine this time I was successful. I then had to resist the urge to get upset over the fact that I had paid to have a new starter installed about a year ago for this very same symptom and had still experienced the same problem shortly afterward. So why did the Lord remind me of this incident this morning? I began to accept that, though indeed I may have damaged my transmission trying to haul fertilizer into my harden, God was not holding that over my head like I am used to doing to feeling. Instead, He had used the ploy of getting my under my van to fix my starter to alert me that I needed to be aware of a potential leak before even more damage might occur like what happened with my daughter's car that we now have to majorly repair. For God, transmission problems - which really triggers fears about lack of money in my natural heart - are not a problem at all like I am used to feeling. I need to see this through the eyes of heaven instead of the eyes of fear. I must trust Him with all of my problems, all of my finances, all of my relationships. When I step over into living in true reality I will be empowered to experience "trials" and difficulties as really being exciting opportunities for god to further reveal Himself to me. "Brethren, count it all joy when....." Jesus, show me Your face, both inside my heart and in the hearts of those around me - and very soon face to face without any distorting barriers between us.

The Rest of the Day's Story

Just after I finished writing the first post this morning, I opened my Bible to Romans 8 where I have been camped out for awhile. A new thought raced across my mind and I decided to try something that I seldom do and don't usually enjoy when others try to get groups of people to do in a meeting. As I looked at the various verses in the last half of the chapter I began to read them while inserting my name into each place where it could fit. the effect on me was immediate, surprising and overwhelming as I read "what shall we say to these things? If God is for Floyd, who is against him? God who did not spare His own Son, Jesus, but delivered Him over for Floyd, how will He not also with Jesus freely give Floyd all things? Whe will bring a charge against God's elect - Floyd? God is the one who justifies Floyd!" At this point I was in tears as the reality of God's word began to have a deeper affect on my heart than it has before. I moved back up to verse 26 and started over putting my name in at every opportunity. This is perfectly legitimate, accurate and even necessary if we are to make the Word of God come alive in our hearts. In addition I began to read it out loud so that my own ears could hear the words and register them even deeper. Suddenly I heard my daughter returning to the house unexpectedly. She had just left for school and we knew there were problems with her car (the second one) overheating from the night before. I quickly wiped away my tears and she exploded into the room in frustration with everything that seemed to be going wrong. It was snowing heavy in the middle of April (not welcome at this time of year), we were already having to replace the transmission on her other car (for the second time in as many weeks) and now this car was severely overheating just a mile from home and she was now late for school. Would I please take her to school? We got into my van and as we made the half hour trip to school she continued to vent. I began to realize one important reason God had sent His presence to me so strong this morning and so early - He knew what was coming and that I needed His Spirit inside me. I kept reminding myself of the things my heart had just experienced and chose to continue to hang on to that reality instead of reacting with irritation at being dumped on by seemingly pointless anger that would do nothing to fix a car. I could begin to see that this day was not going to be average and I began to plan what had to be done. My daughter needed transportation at least four times during the day at a considerable distance from where we are living. I solicited the help of two of my nieces to run shuttles for her while I limped the car through the cold and snow to the mechanic in the next town to get a new water pump. Later in the day the mechanic called to inform me that we had a lot bigger problem than a bad water pump - the head gasket was now blown and the car may not be worth fixing at 21 years old. It also needs new front wheel bearings and new struts as well. So I asked him to speed up the installation of the transmission on the other car which was already waiting at his shop for repair. Again I was tempted to give in to frustration and questions about why all this is happening to us seemingly designed to siphon off all our income. But God has been talking a lot to me over the past months and years and keeps reminding me that I need to mature past that kind of pointless and harmful thinking. I remember that I am in relationship with One who has promised and committed Himself to taking care of me. What He wants is for me to trust Him enough when the pressure is on that others can notice a difference in my attitude and my refusal to live in fear. I want to be more like the simple birds who trust their Maker so implicitly that they can sing praises to Him all day long and simply gather the food He provides for them without worry. "Are you not worth more than many sparrows?"

Shit or Saints?

I have been following the blog of a close friend of mine from many years and have been very saddened through her recent very negative experience while attempting to join a local church. It appears that the church is far more interested in image management than in nurturing and loving people with humility. Of course, in the end it is always God Himself who receives the hit in yet another incident of profaning His reputation. But He knows that that is what we seem to do best and He talks about it and what He wants to do about it in Ezekiel 36.

As I read the comments associated with her recent blogs about this ongoing disaster, I was interested by her sister's comment (who long ago adopted a very openly hostile position toward anything at all to do with any church). In the direct quote from her sister, “KEEP OUT of church !!!!! Like I always told Bobby, 'To me your the bestist person in the world, but to other people your just shit' - goes to show I was right again!!!!”

These words have resonated in my mind overnight and I was surprised when I nearly read the same thing in my Bible this morning as I was absorbing Romans 8. There is was in verse 36. “It is written, 'For Your sake we are being put to death all day long, we were considered as sheep to be slaughtered.'” That sounds an awful lot like being considered “shit” to me. So it looks to me like, instead of being discouraged about this latest salvo of “shit” coming from a fan, my friend may actually be finding herself in very unexpected and excellent company – that of the greatest people who have walked the earth. It's just too bad that the “shit” has to so often be coming from the direction of people who claim to be God-followers. But then, that was just the same situation in Paul's case back then.

So take a look at a little of the context of this passage. What I began to see this morning was a glimpse into the very heart of God as indicated in verses 27-29. “He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren.” (Romans 8:27-29 NAS95)

First I noticed the word “hearts”, and I have learned that in the Bible there is a significant difference between mind and heart most of the time as well as in our own experience. God, Who created us and understands absolutely every shiver of pain in our heart and every other feeling as well, is not unsympathetic or unfeeling or even ignoring us. He has provided His Spirit as an interpreter so that the deepest longings, cravings and desires that even we cannot grasp or articulate, can still be fully communicated directly and instantly (talk about instant messaging!) to the very heart of the One who can most effectively satisfy and protect us and love us completely. In fact, I believe that in the passage where it speaks of the “mind of the Spirit”, that this “mind” is actually the heart of God in reality, or at least has a direct hotline to His heart. And of course, we must not be put off by the term “saints” and think that we do not qualify for that position. Opposite to what the Dark Ages taught us, saints are any person whom God is shaping and drawing and changing to become more like His perfection of beauty.

Verse 28 which is often quoted and more often misunderstood, is a declaration of God's amazing ability to take any circumstances meant to damage and distort and hurt us, and turn them on their head by creating out of them another opportunity for us to grow and prosper and be blessed. And the more we trust His good intentions the more freedom we give Him to exercise this amazing feat in our lives.

I observed the phrase in 27, “according to the will of God”. I then saw what that will is in verse 29 – that we are “predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son”. When we come to realize that His Son is the most beautiful, most attractive, most amazing lover in all the universe, then we will no longer be so afraid of being conformed to reflect His character and personality like a mirror perfectly reflects the image of the one that it is pointed at.

“What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who is against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? Who will bring a charge against God's elect? God is the one who justifies; who is the one who condemns? Christ Jesus is He who died, yes, rather who was raised, who is at the right hand of God, who also intercedes for us. Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword (or heartless people in large churches)? Just as it is written, 'FOR YOUR SAKE WE ARE BEING PUT TO DEATH ALL DAY LONG; WE WERE CONSIDERED AS SHEEP TO BE SLAUGHTERED' (considered shit). But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:31-39 NAS95)

While we are experiencing these things it does not come naturally to feel like we are overwhelmingly conquering. It feels much more like we are fast expiring under a dung-hill. But that is the difference between living in the reality as defined by our visible surroundings and imposed on us by the negative messages about our identity from sin-distorted minds, and choosing to believe the much more real reality of what God says is really going on and what He sees and believes about us. Paul did not shout these triumphant words because he was so smart or so religious or so surrounded by loving people who showered him with blessing and affirmations. He was slamming these words against the darkness of the clouds of pain and every scheme of Satan arranged to break him down and destroy his inner choice to cling to the unseen truth about God. Paul had learned that to declare the words of God is to experience the unleashed power embedded in those words.

So Linda, take heart, even while your heart is bleeding and shredded once again. Satan hates to see anyone even get close to discovering the real truth about God and he goes ballistic with every scheme he can dream up to reinforce his worn-out lies. But they are still just lies. You are not a piece of shit – no one is. You are a princess of the highest order and an heir to the throne of the whole universe. The enemy who lost his position at that very spot is so jealous of you that he will stop at nothing to prevent you from realizing your predestined destiny. But the greatest news is that he is wrong and he is not as strong as the One who is on our side. “What are we to say, then, in the light of all this? If God is on our side, who can there be against us?” (Romans 8:31 TCNT)

Coming Soon - Bat Barakah

Well, the computer delay continues. I am waiting for an important piece of tax information to come in the mail so I can finish my Dad's taxes for last year which are on my computer before I send it in for repair. That, of course, only delays when I will be getting it back. I have had great difficulty finding a monitor that I can use to see what I am doing. I have to plug in an external monitor to my laptop so I can work on it (without staring into a very dark screen with a flashlight to make out shadowy images and words). Every one I have tried so far has not worked at all. Finally I realized that if I could reduce the resolution on my laptop low enough maybe it would show up on the other screens instead of overwhelming their circuits. So I brought it over to my other daughter's house this morning where I am working and hooked up her monitor, which also didn't seem to work. But when I used a flashlight and managed to get the screen resolution reduced enough, sure enough it finally showed up on her screen. So now I can actually see what I am typing and can catch up a little on things needed to be done on the computer and the internet. I will be very happy when the laptop is finally fixed and back to normal. And as for the Bat Barakah -- I'm sure some of you may be scratching your heads wondering what in the world that might be. Well, it would take a lot of explanation which would be much more thorough if you check out the resources at Family Foundations. But very briefly, it is an extension of the basic principle underlying a Bar or Bat Mitzvah. Bar Mitzvah means "son of the law" and Bat means daughter. A Bar or Bat Barakah means "son or daughter of the blessing". It is something extremely important in every person's life but is almost unknown in the Wester Christian culture today. But it is also becoming more known as more and more people learn about it, how important it is for our success in every part of our lives, and begin to reinstate it back into our culture. We have been learning about this for the past couple years. I contacted a man in NC who is leading out in planning and conducting one of these for the young people in his church each year. He sent me a video of the most recent ones which was very moving and inspiring and we decided that our own children desperately need this blessing in their lives. It is a time of empowerment for success, of impartation of identity, a time of recognition, affirmation and a time when something literally supernatural is released in the person's life that is beyond easy explanation. I certainly wish I had received this blessing as most of my friends feel as well. We have been thinking about doing this for some time as I said, but we wanted to involve the important people in my daughter's life which included friends from Norway. We just received a call yesterday that they will be able to come the end of this month if we can plan it for May 5. So that is what we are doing. We are also planning to talk with our other daughters to see if they wish to be part of this ceremony and receive a blessing. Although I am not their biological father, they have become a very intimate part of our immediate family and in some degree look to me as their Dad in various ways. If God wishes to use me to impart whatever blessing I can into their lives in place of their real fathers, I am certainly willing to participate. This is all new to me and I have never been a part of one before - not even as a witness. But I have talked to people who have done this, both in giving and receiving, and I am convinced that it is very real, very significant, and potentially very life-transforming, though maybe not immediately noticeable externally. Please pray for us as we begin planning and preparing for this day. I need an overwhelming infusion of wisdom, love and even prophetic endowment to stand in such an awesome position to be a channel of God to bless my wonderful girls. I do not want them to be short-changed because of my lack or slack. I realize that the blessing really comes from God alone. But He uses people to channel it to us and in a culture where this is almost unheard of it is a bit intimidating to pioneer a new trail. I want this to be a genuine heart experience for all of us, not focused on the external trappings and ceremonies although those may attempt to convey the heart message as well. And for one who is just barely learning about things of the heart this comes as a tremendously challenging assignment.

Four Laws in Romans 7 & 8

Musings from Romans 7 and 8. I see 4 laws introduced here. These laws are not prescriptive rules like we think of law; they are descriptive laws defining forces at work just like gravity is a force. These forces exert power to pull souls to themselves just like gravity pulls our bodies toward the earth. Romans 7:22,23 describes 3 of these laws. They have been alluded to and described since the beginning of Romans. 1.The Law of God. 2.The Law of my mind. 3.The Law of sin and death. The law of God is descriptive of God's perfection and justice and power. The law of sin is immersed in deception, perversion, fear, force, intimidation, selfishness – all tending to death. The law of my mind describes my divinely imparted and protected power to choose. Romans 6:16 talks about using this power of choice to present myself to another power to become it's slave. The law of sin and death is very powerful and takes my mind (law 2) hostage and chains me by force to the body of death condemning me to suffer the poisonous, destructive infections imposed by sin. For clearer understanding of the analogy that Paul uses here, one has to know about a practice familiar to people back in Paul's day. Many of the punishments inflicted on people were calculated to create as much torture as possible as a strong deterrent for others. Most of us are at least somewhat familiar with the process of crucifixion practiced by the Romans designed to extend the victim's pain over several days before they expired. It was designed not only to be very painful but very shameful as well since they were hung up completely naked. But another form of punishment was to chain a dead human body to a living person in such a way that the person would never be able to escape or become free from it. Over time as the dead body decomposed the morbid smells, tissues and fluids would began to infect the body of the living person until he became so poisoned from the rotting body chained to him that he himself would die a very miserable and slow death. With this in mind it is easier to see some of the intensity involved in what Paul talks about in Romans 7 and 8. In Romans 8:2 Paul introduces the Hero in shining armor sent to rescue us from this hostage situation and break the chains that bind our mind (law 2) to the corpse of death. This rescue comes from: 4.The Law of the Spirit of Life in Christ Jesus. Romans 7 describes a mind believing the truth about God and desiring to be sinless like God but held hostage by the law of sin. Romans 8:3 says that looking to the law of God and believing it and wanting to be like Him is not going to free us from the prison of sin or break the chains binding us to the body of death. The spirit of my mind is no match for the spirits of darkness even though I believe truth. I am still chained to the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil which is really the Tree of Death. I can only be set free when I accept the supernatural intervention of Jesus and then abide in Him. Jesus' death put Him in my place chaining Him to the very body of death that I was chained to. He entered into humanity to experience my bondage. If I allow Him to dwell in me – choosing in the law of my mind – then I can become so identified with Him that I will also experience, after death to self, His liberating resurrection power that shatters the chains that bind me to the body of death. Here's a thought to ponder. Did Jesus enter into me in my position as one chained to a dead body or did He enter into the dead body that I am chained to and transform it into a source of life for me instead of a slow, poisonous death? If so, did He undo the chains or just deliver me from the prison of sin to be now chained to His body full of life? (Just a jump-starter thought) For certain, He never uses chains of force like sin does to bind me to Himself. He uses cords of lovingkindness to lure me into love bondage to Him. (see Jer. 31:3 and Hosea 11:3,4) He frees me from the abject slave/ruthless-master system forced on me by Satan's kingdom into a covenant witness protection and marriage-intimacy relationship in the Spirit of Life. Romans 6 makes it clear we will always be in bondage to one “law” or the other. Something must have been permanently damaged in our make-up when Adam sinned and ever since then the law of our mind cannot win or successfully resist the much stronger law of sin that took up permanent residence in our mortal flesh. Since we cannot separate from our flesh and still exist as a person on this earth it appears we will always be hostage in some way to our flesh until the Second Coming of Christ. But it (the law of sin in our flesh) does not have to rule over us. (Rom. 6:14) So maybe the above analogy is not the best. Maybe, instead of Jesus entering the dead body chained to us that is condemning us to death, He enters into our body and His Spirit of life injects more life into our mind (law 2) than the body of death imparts poison. Or maybe on one side of us we are chained to the body of death and on the other side we are intimately bound by covenant to His body of life. Then Romans 8 fits even better in its description of how we are to use our mind – our power of choice. Romans 8:6 says whichever “body” we choose to set our mind on (law 2) determines which outcome we will experience. (next in series)